Sickness Has Fallen Upon Us

In the past few weeks two of my four little ones have fallen ill. We have dealt with vomiting and fevers, hives, and sore throats. When a child gets sick in our house, they are kept in bed as much as possible. They get to rest, watch movies, read books, draw pictures, and play. I don't push school work of any kind on a sick child. As they feel up to it, they can join back into the family activities.

I remember when the kids were in public school and we were told that they couldn't come to school until they had gone 24 hours without a fever over 100 degrees. This meant that when they got sick they missed the day they were sick, sometimes two, and then another day to get to that 24 hour mark. Meredith got sick a lot when she was in public school, at least once a month. It wasn't long before the truancy people from the school were calling me. They wanted a doctor's note every time my daughter stayed home. I do not take my kids to the doctor very much. I can tell the difference between a bacterial and viral infection and I know when to take them to the doctor and when to treat symptoms at home. I was following the school's guidelines and getting in trouble for it. Other parents ignored the guidelines, dropped their kids off at school, and went to work. Then they got upset when they had to leave work to pick up a child who was throwing up in the classroom. These are the same parents that couldn't figure out why my daughter was sick so much.

Since taking the kids out of public school we have been relatively healthy. My kids still get sick, as do I, but not nearly as often. My kids usually get a cold in the spring and one in the fall. They might get a virus once a year. That has been about it. They have never had pink eye or strep throat. Head lice is not even a concern here.

When we get sick we listen to our bodies. They tell us when something isn't right and we respect ourselves enough to take time to rest and get better. There is nobody telling us how many days we have to get better or that we have to keep doing busy work so that we won't forget how to write or read. Learning continues. It just changes forms. Learning is something that we do every day of our lives, not 180 day a year between August and June. We don't struggle to get our school days in. We don't worry about sick days. We learn a lot about health and our bodies when we are sick. Other things can wait until we feel better.

A Roof For the Schoolhouse

Our little schoolhouse needs a new roof. We have been in our house for about 11 years and have added a roof to the long list of updates and repairs that are needed to keep our home from falling down around us. Our house is not pretty. We need to paint the window trim this year. We need new window frames, as ours are rotten, but to replace them would also mean replacing siding and we just can't afford that right now. We have a gravel driveway that is in need of gravel, because right now it is more mud and muck than rock. I need to have a tree in the backyard cut down before it falls on my house. So much outside needs done. It is overwhelming.

I'll be calling the roofing company in the morning to see how much a roof costs these days. Then I will most likely cry.

Shovels and Understanding

Park days and play dates are upon us once again now that the weather is getting tolerable. One of the many ideas to be navigated during this time is sharing. After a long winter, my kids haven't had to share with anyone, with the exception of each other. This isn't a problem for my older children. They seem to have no problem sharing what they have, but it isn't as easy for the younger one.

On our first trip to the park James took his favorite shovel with him. This is the shovel that he has used all winter to scoop up snow while I dug out the sidewalks. He loves this shovel and takes it with him everywhere. He got out of the van, went to the playground with his shovel and was very excited to find that he could also scoop up sand with his shovel. An older boy came over and asked me if he could use the shovel. I told him it wasn't mine, so I could not tell him that he could use it. He looked puzzled and asked if I was "the baby's mom". I told him yes and he asked me for the shovel again. I explained to him that it was not my shovel and that it would be wrong of me to give permission to use something that didn't belong to me. He could ask James if he wanted to use the shovel, but I would not tell him yes or no, because it wasn't my shovel. This child walked away in frustration. He then came back with his mother who asked me if her son could use the shovel. I went through the same conversation with his mother as I had gone through with him. She asked me if I didn't believe in teaching children to share.

During this time James had sat down in the sand and was digging. He had no idea what the conversation was about and he really could care less. He was a boy in the sand with a shovel and he couldn't have been happier. I, however, found myself becoming frustrated and feeling defensive. I do believe in teaching children to share, but this mother wasn't asking me to give a lesson in sharing. She was asking me to pry my son's favorite thing in the world from his hands and give it to her son. This is not sharing and it doesn't teach my son anything about sharing. It does break a bond of trust that I have with my son and I was not willing to do that. I tried very gingerly to explain, to this other mom, that I do teach my kids to share, but that I don't force them to share, because that is not true sharing. True sharing is something that one does for another person without outside pressures. They don't do it because of an external reward or because of impending punishment. It is an act of kindness and love. It can not be forced. Forced sharing is different. It is one person dominating another. I am not out to dominate my children, thus I don't force sharing with others. Trust is one of the basic elements of attachment parenting. As they get older they learn kindness and generosity. It is something that comes with wisdom and experience. It is not something that I expect my toddler to grasp, yet.

We ended up leaving the park early that day. I had mixed feelings about the whole park experience. The kids didn't even know about the confrontation at the sand pit. They all had a great time. I thought it strange that this mother would ask me to make my son share with her son in the first place. I also thought her interest in my parenting habits were a bit intrusive. I am happy with myself, though. I could have easily told her to get lost and she would have left feeling that she was right. I was wrong and that would be that. Instead, she left questioning. She may still feel like I'm wrong, but at least she is questioning why. Questioning is a start to understanding and that is what I strive for in the end. I don't care if people agree with me, but I would love to have others attempt to understand me. I think that understanding is the best thing to share.

We went to our scheduled park day the next day. We took three buckets and 6 shovels with us. James kept his shovel in the car. There were no problems and it was a glorious day.

Home Grown Curriculum

I am once again creating my own curriculum. As in years past, I am not happy with my options. It is getting better out there, but we are an odd bunch here and nothing seems to fit us just right. We are not unschoolers, but we are extremely relaxed most of the time. We are not curriculum junkies, but I have more books than the local public school. We are not religious homeschoolers, but I teach all religions as best I can. We homeschool for academic reasons, for family reasons, and because we simply love our children and love to watch them learn and grow. Finding resources that fit our style is tough. I am still discovering what my style is and it seems to be ever evolving. I don't have a label for it. I can't google it. There isn't a yahoo group for it.

This year is tougher for me than the others have been. I have added my 6 year old into the mix. She is bright, but likes to ask for help, even when she doesn't need it. She wants all of my attention.

I am finding that what I used with Meredith is not going to work with Matthew. I could try to force him to accept her learning style, but it would do more harm than good and in the end we would all suffer for it. Meredith read everything she could get her hands on. She took notes. She wrote reports and stories. Matthew is more hands on. He wants to touch things and do experiments. He wants to take things apart and see how they work. He does math in his head instead of writing it out like his sister did. He wants to be told what to write about instead of having freedom to write anything he wishes.

Meredith is continuing to read far above her grade level. Her understanding of what she reads is amazing and scary. She still doesn't want to read anything about boy/girl relationships, though. While she can read college level books at the age of 11, she is hesitant to grow up. She still wants to be a little girl. Finding reading material that will both stimulate while not offending her is tricky. She is doing great in math now, thanks to the Life of Fred books showing her that math can be fun and can be used in more than just cooking and shopping. Now if only the Life of Fred books incorporated more practice and math computation in their books, I would be happy.

I just can't imagine ever finding a set curriculum that would cover all of my children's needs and my desires. Our interests are a patchwork of who we are and what makes us tick. As we grow, our interests change and the way we learn also grows with us. If I were to buy a learning system for any one of my children for a year, we would end up deviating from that system before it was over with. It is in our nature to change and to need something more or different. My solution to this is to always have many books on hand., to always have something that can help us dive deeper into a subject.

I have ordered several books to supplement and work into my curriculum. Most of my curriculum ends up being a mix of unit studies and supplements. I am just having a hard time bringing it all together this year. I am reading blogs and am getting back to DJ and some other homeschool forums that I used to frequent. That is helping. I just need to come out of the fog I seem to be stuck in. Having a day away from the kids to work on this would help, but that would just be asking too much.

Feel free to leave any helpful hints or comments. I can use all the help I can get.

Simple Art Minutes

I have purchased rolls of adding machine paper for our soon to be added art minutes. During the day the kids seem to always reach a point where they just start to drift off. The school work starts to take hours instead of minutes if I don't somehow reel them back in. If I give them a break from their work and let them go off to play, more often than not, the work is done for the day and all is lost. That isn't an option. I am now going to ask them if they need a minute away from their work. If they do, they can get up, stretch, jump, and wiggle about for a minute. Then they can go get their paper roll. They will have a minute or two to draw something, anything. At the end of their minute or two, I will collect the paper and they go back to their work. The paper will be rolled back up and placed back into its spot until next time. At that time they just continue what they were drawing. It can be a continued cartoon, or a landscape that just keeps evolving. It is up to them. Simple art minutes to get their imagination going and their minds working, to jump start a tired brain. If this doesn't work I can always try coffee.

Today's math

Today we talked about median, range, and average. I told the kids that we were going to run a special at their dad's restaurant. They got to come up with the special. It was smoked toad bellies with a side of snake ears topped with jellied fly testicles. (They had been encouraged to make it something utterly ridiculous. I think they did well.) I explained that this special would run for 2 weeks. We took the numbers of the special that had run the week prior and tried to see what we could discover about how well it sold. We made a table and then figured the median number, the range, and the average of how many specials sold that week. We talked about ordering and sales trends. We talked about how many specials we would want to make ahead of time so that we didn't have to make them during the dinner rush. We wanted to make enough, but not too many. Any that were made ahead of time that didn't sell would have to be thrown out and would end up being lost inventory. I then gave them sales figure for the special for the first week. Again they did some figuring and decided if they wanted to make any changes in the amount of product that was prepped ahead of time. It was a lot of fun. I think their dad would approve of the lesson, just not the special.

What we are reading now

I just finished reading Story Time by Edward Bloor. I found the author's take on standardized testing to be interesting and slightly disturbing. Then again I find standardized tests to be disturbing on their own. Now I am reading The Evolution Of Calpurnia Tate by Jaqueline Kelly. It is refreshingly original as few books for this age group are. I am enjoying it, myself, even though I picked it up for Meredith. For myself I am reading several biographies of Albert Einstein.

Meredith has finished The Cartoon Guide to Genetics by Larry Gonick. She has not moved onto The Cartoon Guide to Chemistry, but she would like to read more on the topic of genetics. She is also reading Anne of Green Gables. She was reading Mossflower by Brian Jaques, but put it on hold when I asked her to read Anne of Green Gables. I didn't realize she was working on something, or I would have waited to give her something new.

Matthew is reading Atilla The Hun Leader of the Barbaian Hordes by Sean Stewart Price. He isn't reading anything else right now. I told him that I wanted him to do a review of this book and I think he is trying to give it his full attention.

Meg is reading several short readers. Some are Bob Books. Some are phonics readers. Today she worked on a book that had the long e sound entitled Neat Feet.

James has discovered books by Todd Parr. His favorite right now is Dos and Don'ts.

We have just finished Fablehaven Secret of the Dragon Sanctuary by Brandon Mull. The next book in the series is due out later this month. It is on our long list to read. Until then we will be reading George's Secret Key to the Universe by Lucy and Stephen Hawking. We are also reading several poems this month. Usually I read a certain style of poetry or stick to one topic, but during April we read it all. It is a fun month for reading aloud.

Homeschool update

I will soon be making our book purchase for the year. I say I do this in the spring so that I have the summer to get organized, but since we "school" year round it doesn't really matter. Recently I purchased The Cartoon Guide to Genetics by Larry Gonick thinking that it might be something to add to our middle school or high school curriculum. Meredith has read the book in the last two days and wants to know more about genetics. If anyone has any ideas for books that a 5th grader can understand about genetics, please let me know. She is learning so much on her own that I really only focus on math and writing with her. I have the Life of Fred books for Meredith to work her way through in math. I pair these with a traditional math book that focuses more on computation than application. I am still looking for math books that are for the middle school years that will work for us. We are also beginning to work on art history and appreciation rather than just playing with materials. Meredith has always been so easy to teach, because she loves to learn all she can and really seems to understand that life isn't divided into subjects. She wants to learn math, because she can see its use in art and science. She wants to learn about grammar and poetry because it helps her to understand what she reads, which in turn helps her to understand everything around her.

Matthew is writing much better this year. I am so happy to see the progress made from writing just a few sentences at the beginning of the year to writing a page of well thought out information. I was beginning to worry that he would never be able to sit down and write. I found that when I give him a subject, a story starter, even a word to start with, he is able to take off and write, but if I give him an empty sheet of paper, the expression on his face will mirror the blank page. Matthew is ready to jump into 5th grade math, but I am going to work with him on applying math a bit before we jump into the next book. I have found that he needs to see how the math is relevant in everyday life to embrace it. He knows how to do the math. Now he needs to learn why he should even bother with it. (I am going to break her to complain about our current math book, that we got from the public school. It tells us all the time to use a calculator. My children can use a calculator when they are in calculus. They have brains.) We will continue to work on the writing process. Matthew will be writing a book review shortly and then we are jumping into poetry. He likes to write acrostic poems. This year we will cover couplets and limericks. I just know he is going to be a great limerick writer.

Meg is still working on learning to read. She still claims to not be a reader as she isn't an independent chapter book reader, yet. She'll get there. Her attention span is increasing, but I have to remind myself that she is only 6. I will start her first grade instruction this summer as she allows. She is adding and subtracting in math. She is reading words with both short and long vowel sounds. We have started different letter blends such as bl, br, th, sh, ch, and ck. I think she is doing rather well. She just has to stop comparing herself to her older siblings and look at how much she has learned in such a short time.

James is happy watching Barney, playing with blocks, helping me with dishes, coloring in color books or on paper, and drawing on the dry erase board. His vocabulary is increasing daily as he listens to all of the learning going on around him. He will be 2 in just a few weeks. Our lives have changed so much since he came into them. He is a challenge, but one that I am happy to take on.

As the public schools scramble to try to figure out how to make due with lack of funds and more budget cuts, we continue to struggle to make ends meet. In the end, though, I have to do what is best for my family. Money is no substitute for my time and energy focused on my children. I will not be putting the kids back in public school anytime soon. We continue to evaluate all of our options several times a year and thus far, homeschooling still makes the most sense. Where else can the get the teacher to student ratio that they have now, the love and encouragement that a family provides, and the time to be children and follow their interests? Public schools do their best to offer these things as best they can, but just as stated in The Wizard of Oz, "There's no place like home."